Personal growth is a topic that, at times, can seem like a buzzword, but it is something that most of us focus on at some point. For anyone looking to work on their personal growth, self-awareness is paramount. You often hear personal growth used in leadership development circles; it is much broader than this. It does not matter if you are leading a team, running a major corporation, starting your own business, or seeking personal development; understanding yourself—your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors—is the key to unlocking your full potential. I would argue that self-awareness is the cornerstone of personal growth, but despite its importance, self-awareness can be challenging to achieve and maintain due to various barriers. This post will explore the basics of self-awareness, common barriers, and practical ways to cultivate this essential trait.  Additionally, we will dive more into how to use this with your career.

 What is Self-awareness?

At its core, self-awareness is observing and understanding one's thoughts, emotions, and actions. It involves being conscious of how one perceives oneself and how others perceive you. This awareness is essential because it enables us to recognize our strengths and weaknesses, understand our emotional triggers, and make informed decisions that align with our values.

Self-awareness can be broken down into two types:

1.  Internal Self-awareness: This is your ability to recognize your own feelings, thoughts, values, and behaviors. It's the introspective aspect of self-awareness—knowing what drives you and understanding your emotional patterns.
2. External Self-awareness: This involves understanding how others perceive you. External self-awareness helps you recognize how your actions affect others and how you come across in different settings.

Example of Internal Self-awareness

Imagine an individual (who might be named Jay) who realizes they are a bit of a perfectionist and tends to become impatient when things are not done a certain way.  By recognizing this internal emotional trigger, I (I mean an individual) can develop strategies to stay calm and remember there are many ways to complete specific tasks. 

Example of External Self-awareness

Many people believe they are approachable and open to feedback. Still, when they seek honest input from people close to them, they discover that some feel intimidated by their communication style. Understanding this external perspective allows us to adjust and foster a more inclusive environment.

Self-awareness is not a fixed trait; it can be developed over time through deliberate practice and reflection. However, common barriers can hinder our ability to cultivate self-awareness.

Critical Barriers to Practicing Self-awareness

While self-awareness is crucial for personal and professional growth, several obstacles can prevent individuals from fully embracing it. These barriers often stem from human tendencies and require conscious effort.  

 Ego and Overconfidence

One of the most common barriers to self-awareness is ego. Often, individuals believe they already clearly understand themselves and their behaviors. This inflated sense of self can prevent them from accepting feedback, reflecting on their actions, or recognizing their flaws.  You can see this often when individuals believe their experience in a particular area makes them immune to mistakes. To combat ego, individuals must adopt a growth mindset emphasizing continuous learning and self-improvement. Regularly seeking feedback, practicing humility, and acknowledging that there's always room for growth are vital ways to stay grounded.

Defensiveness and Fear of Criticism

Many people (myself included) become defensive when confronted with feedback that challenges their self-perception. The fear of being criticized can prevent honest self-reflection, causing individuals to shut down instead of learning from constructive criticism. We may THINK we are open to feedback, but more often than not, there is a tendency to push back. Viewing feedback as a tool for growth rather than a personal attack is essential. We can train ourselves to respond to feedback with curiosity rather than defensiveness by asking questions like, "Can you help me understand this further?" and reflecting on how we can improve based on the feedback received.

Emotional Reactivity

Emotional reactivity refers to the tendency to react impulsively to emotions without pausing to reflect. This can make it challenging to practice self-awareness because emotions cloud judgment and prevent individuals from seeing situations objectively. This reactivity can manifest in individuals snapping at others for seemingly minor things. Practicing mindfulness (more to come on this term) can help individuals manage their emotional responses by staying present in the moment. When emotions arise, taking a deep breath and pausing before reacting allows for more thoughtful and measured responses.

Lack of Time for Reflection

We are all busy! Many people struggle to find time for self-reflection in today's fast-paced world. Regular introspection makes it easier to maintain touch with your emotions, thoughts, and actions, making it easier to maintain self-awareness. It can be challenging to avoid multiple responsibilities and deliverables, creating a barrier to reflection. Over time, we can become increasingly reactive and unaware of how stress affects how we show up daily. Building reflection time into your routine is crucial for developing self-awareness. Even setting aside just 10-15 minutes at strategic times of each day to reflect on critical experiences, emotional responses, and interactions can profoundly impact self-awareness.

Avoidance of Uncomfortable Truths

Self-awareness requires confronting uncomfortable truths about yourself, such as recognizing your weaknesses or admitting when you've made mistakes. However, many people avoid this discomfort, preferring to focus only on positive aspects of themselves. This rose-colored glasses approach to ourselves can be a significant hindrance in areas where we need to be our best. Embracing a growth mindset by accepting that discomfort is a natural part of self-improvement. By regularly reflecting on areas for growth, we can confront our weaknesses and take actionable steps to address them. 

How to Develop Self-awareness: Practical Tips

While the barriers to self-awareness seem significant, they can be overcome with deliberate practice. Here are some effective strategies to help you cultivate self-awareness in your personal and professional life:

Practice Mindfulness

 Mindfulness is a term that has always elicited more questions from me. What exactly does that mean? A definition that has worked for me is staying present and fully engaged by paying attention to your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations to become more attuned to your internal state. Much like keeping an eye on the gauges on the car's dashboard, mindfulness involves keeping an eye on your internal gauges.

 What does that mean in practice? Some will recommend a simple mindfulness exercise, like focusing on your breath for a few minutes daily. Notice how your body feels, what emotions arise, and where your mind wanders. Returning to the analogy of the gauges, we are all trained to be looking for something that looks off. My mindfulness practice involves pausing for a few minutes to check in with myself throughout the day.  No matter how I feel, I take a moment to understand why. Over time, mindfulness can help you develop greater awareness of your emotional triggers and thought patterns.

 Seek Regular Feedback

No matter how we THINK we are coming across, input from others is invaluable. Feedback from others is essential for developing external self-awareness. Family, friends, and even coworkers can provide valuable insights into how you are perceived and where there may be blind spots in your behavior. Take the time to ask for that feedback, be open to constructive criticism, and view it as an opportunity for growth rather than a personal attack.

Keep a Reflective Journal

Journaling allows you to process your thoughts and understand how your internal state affects your behaviors.  Now, before you start to leave comments saying, "I don't have time to journal!".  "I am not C.S. Lewis with volumes of journals!".  I understand, but let me say that writing down your thoughts, emotions, and daily experiences can help you track patterns and gain clarity over time. It does not mean you have to write pages and pages.  It can be one or two sentences. Set aside time each day or week to write about your experiences. Reflect on critical moments and how you responded emotionally. Do not forget to include the moments when you took an "L" (loss) that day. Over time, you'll notice patterns that can help improve your self-awareness. This will help you in the next step.

Engage in Reflection and Review

Set aside regular reflection time, whether at the end of each day, week, or month. Reflection helps you look back on recent experiences, assess how you handled situations, and identify areas for improvement. Ask yourself questions like, "What went well today?" "Where could I have handled things differently?" or "How did my emotions affect my decisions?" For sports fans, the teams we watch have film reviews. Fortunately (or unfortunately), they have their critical performances recorded, and they get to watch the good plays and bad plays to understand how they can improve their craft. We can do the same by simply taking the time to reflect.

Self-awareness in the Workplace: The Essential Skill for Effective Leadership

How does self-awareness translate into the workplace?  Self-awareness is more than just a buzzword—it's a critical skill that can transform how leaders connect with their teams, make decisions, and build a positive work culture. Leaders who understand their strengths, recognize their limitations, and gauge their impact on others can inspire, motivate, and navigate complex situations with increased clarity and empathy.

Why Self-awareness Matters in the Workplace

It was mentioned previously in this post that self-awareness is the ability to recognize your emotions, behaviors, and their effects on others. It's also about understanding how others see you, which is fundamental for clear communication and strong leadership.

For leaders, self-awareness is invaluable because every decision, action, interaction, and word can affect the team. Self-aware leaders can anticipate how their responses will impact others, fostering an environment where people feel seen, respected, and motivated to contribute.

Here's how self-awareness plays a transformative role in the workplace:

Better Decision-making

Self-aware leaders make more informed and thoughtful decisions because they understand their biases and emotional triggers. This awareness enables them to objectively assess situations, considering personal and organizational values. A self-aware leader who knows they become frustrated might recognize this response in a pressure-filled moment. Instead of rushing through a decision, they pause, gather input from their team, and make more strategic choices that reflect the team's and organization's goals.

Enhanced Emotional Intelligence

Before diving into emotional intelligence, I want to point out that, like mindfulness, it is a commonly used word in the workplace, but what does it mean?  Emotional intelligence (EI) is the ability to recognize, understand, manage, and influence your own emotions as well as the emotions of others. It's a skill that enables people to navigate social complexities, build strong relationships, and make informed, empathetic decisions. Self-awareness is foundational to emotional intelligence because before we can truly understand and navigate the emotions of those around us, we must understand our own. Leaders with high emotional intelligence (and self-awareness) can manage their emotions, empathize with their team, and foster collaboration. Imagine a leader who knows they're feeling overwhelmed during a big project. It might be easy to let the stress affect their interactions, but instead, they acknowledge it and take steps to manage it—delegating tasks, setting priorities, or taking short breaks. This approach maintains a calm, supportive environment and prevents stress from spreading through the team.

More robust, More Trusting Relationships

Self-aware leaders understand how their actions impact others. This awareness helps them communicate more effectively, resolve conflicts constructively, and build a culture of openness and transparency. A leader who recognizes they tend to dominate discussions might consciously take a backseat and encourage others to contribute. This inclusive approach strengthens trust, respects others' input, and fosters a more collaborative environment.

Personal and Professional Growth

Self-aware leaders are receptive to feedback and always looking for ways to grow. We all have strengths and weaknesses; by acknowledging them, leaders model continuous improvement and inspire others to do the same. Managers may realize that time management isn't a strength they possess and seek training or mentorship to enhance productivity. This investment in personal growth benefits the leader and the entire team. 

How Self-awareness Benefits Leaders Directly

While self-awareness enhances team dynamics and culture, it also brings valuable benefits to leaders themselves. Here are a few reasons why developing self-awareness is one of the best investments a leader can make:

Increased Leadership Effectiveness

Self-aware leaders know when to leverage their strengths and when to seek help. This awareness helps them confidently lead, delegate effectively, and make a meaningful impact.

Improved Stress Management

Self-aware leaders can recognize when they're reaching their limits and take proactive steps to manage stress. By addressing stress early, they stay resilient and focused under pressure.

Enhanced Communication Skills

Self-aware leaders communicate with clarity and empathy, fostering better connections with their team and minimizing misunderstandings.

Greater Emotional Regulation

Emotional intelligence begins with self-awareness. Leaders who understand their emotional responses can manage them, remaining calm and collected, even in challenging situations.

Adaptability and Flexibility

Self-aware leaders can adjust their approach to fit different people's and situations' needs, making them more adaptable and effective.

How to Develop Self-awareness at Work

Building self-awareness is an ongoing process that requires intentional effort. Here are practical steps for developing self-awareness as a leader:

Set Time Aside for Reflection

Reflection is essential for self-awareness. Reviewing your actions, decisions, and interactions provides valuable insights into how you show up at work. Reserve intentional time in your schedule to reflect on key events or decisions. Ask yourself, "How did I handle that situation?" "What emotions influenced my behavior?" and "What could I do differently next time?" 

Actively Seek Feedback

Feedback from colleagues, team members, or mentors provides an external perspective, revealing blind spots and highlighting strengths. Embracing feedback is vital for external self-awareness. Asking questions like "How do you feel I handled that project?" or "Is there anything I could have done differently?" Viewing feedback as a growth tool rather than criticism fosters a culture of openness and trust.

Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness helps you stay present and aware of your thoughts and emotions. This presence allows you to notice emotional triggers and respond thoughtfully. Mindfulness during meetings or conversations enables you to remain fully present, actively listening without judgment.

Develop Emotional Regulation Techniques

Emotional regulation allows you to manage stress and stay composed under pressure. By understanding your emotional responses, you can respond more effectively. When you feel stress or frustration building, take a moment to pause and assess how and why you feel the way you do. Taking a quick walk or counting to ten can help you regain control and prevent impulsive reactions.

Conclusion

Self-awareness is the foundation of personal AND professional growth. It is also crucial to effective leadership. Individuals who understand their emotions, thoughts, and actions can make more intentional choices, build stronger relationships, and create positive workplace cultures. While barriers like ego, defensiveness, and reactivity can make self-awareness challenging, they're not insurmountable if we are intentional in certain areas. By committing to reflection, seeking feedback, practicing mindfulness, and managing emotions, we can develop a deeper self-awareness that can serve us in our personal and professional journeys.